A Series of Drabbles
by Envytastic
Summary: A series of puzzleshipping and tendershipping short stories that randomly popped into my head, too short to be one-shots. Mostly funny and/or fluffy. Filled with Crabbles (Crack drabbles) YYxY BxR
1. BMI

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping**

_**X-x-o-o**__**—**_BMI_**—**_o-o-x-X

Anzu smiled at the results of her BMI. It was 17.3, meaning she was underweight but she didn't mind. She needed it to be, if she wanted to have the body of a dancer.

"Anzu-chan, what are you doing?" Yugi asked from behind the computer chair the girl was sitting on.

"Hey Yugi, just checking my Body Mass Index." She explained.

"What's that?" The former pharaoh asked also joining Yugi behind the chair.

"It's to see if you're weight fits with your height." Yugi explained. "How about I calculate Yugi's." Anzu suggested. "Let's see, height is 153 and weight is 42 kilograms." She pressed the calculate button. They didn't even have to wait one second for the results to appear. The result was 17.9

"Oh, the norm for a good weight is 18.5, so you're underweight Yugi." Anzu read the screen. Yami didn't think of it much, he watched the bar with the three colors, his Aibou's pointer pointing in to the yellow area. His eyes trailed down to the text below the bar and they widened.

"How about we calculate yours, Yami?" Anzu suggested as she turned around, only to see the two boys gone. "Where are Y-"

"YAMI STO-MMPHH."

Anzu stood abruptly from her chair and rushed to where the cry came from. She arrived at the kitchen to find Yugi on the floor, mouth stuffed with food and Yami raiding the fridge for more food. Yugi looked at Anzu, pleading for help with his eyes.

"Aibou, you need to gain weight right now!" Yami screamed in despair. "That thing said it could affect your health! Hurry!" Yami said dumping more foot on Yugi's lap.

Anzu giggled and turned around, leaving him to his overprotective boyfriend's mercy.

* * *

**Author's Note: **These used to be all in one chapter but I have decided to seperate them all so I didn't have to have a whole collection to add a new one so I could update more regularly.


	2. Wedding

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping**

_**X-x-o**__**—**_Wedding_**—**_o-o-x-X

"Dearly beloveds, we have come together to binds these two into holy matrimony." The priest announced, indicating to the two tricolor-haired boys in front of him. The taller one was wearing a black tuxedo while the smaller one was wearing a wedding dress, the priest didn't know why and he preferred to not know either.

The looked at each other lovingly, not paying any attention to the priest so he just decided to continue. "If there is anyone, who thinks these two should not get married." The priest stopped and frowned, was he really supposed to say this?

"Play your trap card now or forever hold your peace…." He read reluctantly, looking at the couple to see if it was correct, again they paid him no heed. The priest shrugged his shoulders and wanted to continue but was interrupted.

"I play the continues trap card, Mask of Restrict! Yami won't be able to say 'I do' anymore!"

Yugi and the guest all gasped as they turned to look at the person who interrupted the wedding. Yami whipped his head around to look at the one who dared to interrupt his wedding with a murderous glare that would even scare Exodia."

The man was none other than… Pegasus? "They are both male! This is unorthodox!" The man proclaimed. Murmurs went through the crowd as they talked amongst themselves; they were shut up by the malicious voice of the groom.

"I play Remove Trap, which destroys Mask of Restricts, making me able to say 'I do' again and then I summon Interplanetarypurplythorny Dragon! Interplanetarypurplythorny Dragon, attack Pegasus directly!" The dragon did as told and attacked Pegasus, bringing his full 2000 life points to zero. Pegasus fainted.

Yami turned back to the priest. "Continue." He growled. The priest broke out in a cold sweat. The groom hadn't lost his death glare while the bride was looking at the groom with huge shimmering shoujo eyes, filled with love, devotion and adoration.

The priest cleared his throat and looked at the customized book. "Do you, Sennen Yami, take Mutou Yugi to be your lawfully wedded… uke?" The priest asked unsure. "To take care of him in sickness, love him with all your heart till the day you die and to protect him from evildoers?" Yami had lost all malice in his voice and said "I do." With as much love as he could muster, which was a lot. The crowd broke into applause.

"Do you, Mutou Yugi, take Sennen Yami to be your lawfully wedded seme." The priest read, he wasn't surprised anymore; this wedding could not get any weirder. "To take care of him in sickness, love him with all your heart till the day you die and to satisfy his every need?" The mouth of the priest was agape.

"I do!" Screamed a teary eyed Yugi. "You may now exchange your Polymerization cards." The priest said with no emotions. The two boys exchanged the cards. "I now pronounce you polymerized. You may kiss your uke." The priest announced. The boys kissed passionately, making quite a show. The priest fled the wedding, now that his job was done.

'_Was this wedding even valid?!' _He thought. After this wedding, the priest decided to never do a customized wedding, EVER again.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I have to credit my best friend for this idea. He made a bit of this up on the spot when we were drinking bubble tea xD.

By the way, Interplanetarypurplythorny Dragon, is a real Duel Monster card.


	3. Ice Cream

**Pairing: Tendershipping**

_**X-x-o**__**—**_Ice cream_**—**_o-o-x-X

"Why is it so god damn hot?!" Bakura screamed in frustration, his hair flying in all kinds of different directions because of the fan rotating on its highest stand in front of him.

"Don't be such a sour puss Bakura, it is summer after all." His cheery former host said as he plopped onto the couch, a cardboard bucket in one hand and a spoon in the other. He pulled the lid of the top and shoved a spoonful of the icy goodness into his mouth, sighing happily as the substance immediately cooled his mouth and throat as he swallowed.

Bakura took a couple of whiffs and caught the scent of the cold creamy treat. He scrambled to his feet and made a beeline to the couch, where his little lover sat.

"Give me some." He demanded.

Ryou hid the bucket behind him and glared at the white haired man. "Mine." He growled.

Bakura leaned to grab the bucket but was forced away as Ryou started kicking him. "Share some with me Ryou!" Bakura screamed, still trying to reach for it. "Get your own!" Ryou screamed with as much fervor as his violent boyfriend.

"You have a whole bucket!" Bakura retorted, his fingers brushing the cardboard bucket. "No!" Ryou screamed, kicking Bakura in the gut, harder than he intended. Bakura staggered back a little and clutched his stomach.

The former thief glared at his former host but it quickly faltered as he saw the cute glare his little lover gave him. He sat down next to Ryou and crossed his arms over his chest. "Fine, I don't need your stinking ice cream."

Ryou stopped glaring and returned to his ice cream. He shoved another spoonful into his mouth and savored the taste.

"Hey… Yadonushi…." Bakura purred. Ryou looked at Bakura and his eyes widened, his lover's eyes were half-lidded and darkened with lust. Before he could do anything, Bakura's mouth crashed on his own. Ryou's eyes closed and his lips parted automatically. Bakura inwardly smirked into the kiss.

Although most of the ice cream had melted, there was still enough that would fill about half a spoon. He twirled his tongue around the frozen treat and pulled it into his own mouth, parting from his little lover's mouth as he successfully had it all in his mouth.

Ryou was flushed and in a daze, not realizing his treat had been stolen from him, while Bakura swallowed it in victory.

After all, he was not called the King of Thieves for nothing.


	4. Torture

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping**

_**X-x-o-o**__**—**_Torture_**—**_o-o-x-X

How, HOW had he been convinced to come here?! It was Yugi again, damn that boy and his adorableness. Yami peeked through an opening and immediately hid back as he saw his boyfriend looking around for him.

A shiver went up his spine as he thought of the torture he would be receiving, carrying countless bags, be forced to try on the numerous clothes his Aibou and Anzu threw at him, wait endlessly while they changed and not to mention that his wallet would be lighter at the end of the day. It's not that he disliked spending money on Yugi, he just preferred to have money left so he could feed him.

Yes you were correct, they dragged him out to go shopping. Yami could swear that sometimes Yugi was a woman. He heard two footsteps approaching and backed away as far as he could, from underneath the hanging clothes, he could see that the feet were too big to be Yugi's yet, the black shiny combat boots were so familiar…

His eyes widened as he realized who they belonged to.

"Pharaoh?" The gruff voice asked.

Yami shushed the thief. "What are you doing there?" He asked, ignoring the former pharaoh's frantic attempts to silence the thief.

"YAAAAMIIIIIII! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

"Heh." The thief laughed. His face was shadowed by his hair and his eyes shone like two piercing lights, Yami felt like a deer caught in headlights as he looked in Bakura's eyes.

"Don't worry pharaoh, I won't tell." Bakura said sugar sweet. Yami didn't know what to think of it.

"If you strip and run a circle around the mall, naked." Bakura added, that evil glint back in his eyes.

"Never." Yami growled. "Well in that case~ Yugi! He's here!" The white haired thief yelled. Yami said profanities under his breath, as he heard the pitter patter of Yugi's feet.

"You found him? Thank you Bakura." Yami flinched as his Aibou thanked the thief for finding him, it was like rubbing salt on his wound, Bakura was aware of this. His grin almost spit his face in half.

"Yami, why were you hiding?" Yugi asked hurt. Yami crawled out from under the cloth rack. "Aibou…." He sighed. "If you didn't want to come, you should've said so." Yugi reprimanded. Yami's mouth opened, he did say that he didn't want to come but Yugi kept on begging till he caved!

"Oh well, since you're here anyway, I found a couple of pants while looking for you that would look great on you!" He said as he grabbed Yami's hand and took him to the men's department, where Anzu had an armful of shirts he would be forced to try on.

"CURSE YOU BAKURAAAAAA!"


	5. Hair

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping, Tendershipping**

_**X-x-o-o**__**—**_Hair_**—**_o-o-x-X

"Ugh, move it Pharaoh, your freaky hair is blocking the screen!" An annoyed thief said as he swatted the spiky gravity defying hair away.

"Will you stop messing up my hair you stupid thief!" Yami growled as he threw some popcorn at the white haired thief who was sitting on the couch in front of him.

Ryou, who was sitting next to Bakura, sighed. "Here they go again."

"Yup." Yugi answered, taking a handful of popcorn from the bowl that was on Yami's lap. He sat in front of Ryou, leaning against the couch. Ryou had parted Yugi's hair and leaned rested his arms on the small boy's head to keep the hair out of his vision.

They were watching a new anime show about giants eating people for no apparent reason. Yugi and Ryou loved it because it had heart wrenching scenes, Yami liked it because of the protagonists courage and devotion to save humanity and Bakura loved it because it was bloody.

"It's in my way!" Bakura screamed, pushing the head of Yami down. Bakura finished it by using Yami's lowered head as a footstool.

Yami was fuming. He grabbed the legs of Bakura and yanked him off the couch. The thief fell on his bottom, hard.

Soon the two were rolling around on the floor, trying to dominate the other. Their boyfriends paid them no attention, used to their antics.

"You know…" Ryou finally said as the ending credits rolled. "Bakura, you have weird hair too." Yugi nodded in agreement. The two boys stopped rolling around and looked at the white haired boy. Yami was lying with his back on the ground, his hands wrapped around Bakura's throat and Bakura was on top of Yami, his arm retracted, ready to punch.

"What?" Bakura asked in disbelieve. Yami sniggered, earning the punch from Bakura.

"GOD DAMN IT!" He yelled, flipping them over and throwing a punch of his own. "Yeah, I mean, you have like horns in your hair." Yugi explained, raising his hands to his head and mimicked the horn-like hair. Ryou giggled a little at Yugi's mimic, Yami laughed and Bakura glared.

"Heheh, your hair is horny." Yami chuckled, even Bakura laughed at that while Yugi and Ryou just shook their heads with the same thought going through their minds. _'Perverts.'_

Yami's attention turned back to Bakura and suddenly realized the compromised position they were in. "AW SICK!" Yami screamed as he jumped off of Bakura.

"Well, at least it's more normal than their hair!" Bakura defended, moving his pointing finger from Yami to Yugi. "There are people who have weirder hair than us, uhm for example Marik!" Yami suggested.

"Almost, the styles are about the same but at least his is one color." Ryou analyzed. "But what about his bangs?" Yugi said. "It looks like wings, I swear sometimes I watch them just to see if they will suddenly leave his head and fly off into the horizon.

The group burst into laughter at the mental image. "Okay so, ours is weirder than Marik's. What about Saruwatari, Pegasus' lackey?" Yami asked. "Ah the unicorn." Bakura remembered. "It could be normal if he doesn't gel it up like that, same for Honda-kun." Ryou told.

"But what if it's natural like that? I mean mine and Yami's are natural like this." Yugi said pointing to his hair. "Still, yours are weirder than someone who wants to be a unicorn."

"Hmm…" The four sat in silence as they went through their mental archive of people they met.

"AHA!" Yami screamed. "Dartz!"

"Dartz' hair isn't that weird." Bakura countered. "Dude, his hair gives people an epileptic attack if they look at it long enough; I swear it keeps on changing color." Yami explained.

Now that Bakura had thought about it, and as much as he hated to admit it, the pharaoh was right. He had never determined if Dartz' hair was green, blue, cyan…"

At the end, they decided indeed that Dartz had the weirdest hair, because it could send people to the hospital by just looking at it.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Inspired by Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series


	6. Letter

**Pairing: Tendershipping, Puzzleshipping**

_**X-x-o-o**__**—**_Letter_**—**_o-o-x-X

_Dear Amane,_

_How have you been? I've been great these last years. I have a loving boyfriend by my side and wonderful friends who are like family to me._

_Yugi, I've written about him to you before, is like my little brother. His lover, Yami and Bakura are always fighting over the smallest things. Actually I think the two have become best friends, even though they'd both rather die than admitting that. Yugi and I enjoy watching them fight, it's quite amusing._

_Once, Yugi, Yami, Bakura and I went to the public baths. Yami's clothes got stolen and of course Bakura was immediately accused. Bakura yanked of Yami's towel and in revenge Yami did the same to Bakura. The two chased each other like that through the whole bathing area, scarring a lot of children in the lobby. We are forever banned from the public baths. It was Yugi who hid the clothes._

_Of course there are our other friends like Malik and Marik but we don't see them often since they moved back to Egypt to live with Ishizu-san and Rishid. Jounouchi-kun, Honda-kun, Otogi-kun and Mazaki-chan I see often but I'm not as close with them as I am with Yugi, after all, he has also experienced sharing a body with a Yami and eventually falling for them, the other's don't understand it as he does. An extremely strong bond is created that way._

_As you can see, I am doing very well. I wouldn't change my life for anything, well except for you to be by my side. Say hi to mother from me. I love you both very much._

_Love, Ryou_


	7. 手をつないで

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping**

_**X-x-o-o**__**—**__**手をつないで**__**—**__**o-o-x-X**_

Holding hands, it's something so simple and innocent, yet why was he a blushing mess.

Crimson eyes gazed over to his companion next to him. The violet eyes of him were cast downwards, his cheeks tinted in a pinkish red. They stood side to side and their fingers would brush against each other with the smallest of movements. It seemed that he had noticed this too for he dared not look him in the eyes.

He took a deep breath, his nervousness showing in his crimson orbs. His palm was sweaty and his hand was trembling. He closed his eyes and slowly moved his hand and wrapped it over the smaller one. Slowly the shorter fingers wrapped themselves over his own hand. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding in and opened his eyes.

He once again looked at the face of his smaller companion. His gaze was still averted from his own, his cheeks were a darker red and his lips were curled into a small but happy smile.

He squeezed the smaller hand a little and couldn't help the smile forming on his own face.

_Te wo tsunaide = Hand in hand_


	8. Jealousy

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping**

_**X-x-o-o**__**—**_Jealousy_**—**_o-o-x-X

Yami glared and growled as he looked at Charley.

That, that, abomination would steal his Aibou's attention away from him and had hurt Yami on more than one occasion.

It randomly attacked him and when he did, it made such a mess too. Yugi would be angry with him instead of Charley, calling him harmless and incapable of attacking him, making Yami clean the mess Charley made. If only Yugi knew….

Yami would have gotten rid of him, but then his Aibou would be upset.

"Are you glaring at Charley again?"

Yami turned around to see Yugi enter the room with a glass of water in his hand. He walked to the windowsill and poured the contents of the glass into the pot.

"Honestly Yami, I still can't figure out how you keep hurting yourself, I mean it's just standing there and doing nothing else." Yami's glare hardened as his eyes narrowed.

Yami was jealous of the cactus.

* * *

**Author's Note: **This idea came from my own cactus named Charley. I swear sometimes it falls to impale my face out of nowhere.


	9. Swept Away

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping**

_**X-x-o-o—Swept Away**__**—**_o-o-x-X

"Yuugi…. I have been meaning to say this for a long time now…. Yuugi I l-"

BAM.

"KAIBA!" Said person growled and turned around as one particularly annoying (in his eyes) interrupted his confession. The confession, for which he had finally gather all the courage he could muster.

"What is it Make inu." He ground out between his teeth.

"I will not let you have my Yuugi!" The blonde nuisance yelled. Kaiba stood up abruptly, making the chair he was sitting in clatter and fall to the floor. The three now held all the attention of the small café they were occupying (not that it was too busy).

"YOUR Yuugi?!" Kaiba drawled preposterous. "What belongs to me can never belong to you." The incredibly tall man stated. This time it was Jounouchi who growled. The two started bickering, completely forgetting that the object of both their affection was sitting lonely at the table.

In their usual fight about Yuugi, the two did not hear the bell of the café door ring as yet another person entered the café. He ignored the arguing duo and made a beeline to the sitting small lonely boy.

"Yuugi." He called with his apparently deep baritone voice. Said boy looked up and his face lit up tenfold at seeing the face of his friend. "Yami!" Yuugi greeted with a hug.

"Hn. Why would he choose a tramp like you when he can have all he wants with me?"

"Ch. Yuugi would never love someone with a ten foot pole up their pompous ass."

"Are they at it again." Yami asked as he regarded the two males in dispute. "Yep." Yuugi answered. The two were silent, with only Jounouchi's and Kaiba's screaming in the background. They had both averted their gazes as they looked at the other people in the café (who were already paying no more attention to the two), the floor and ceiling.

"So um…." Yami started awkwardly. "Would you like to go out with me Yuugi?" Yami asked. Yuugi looked at him with a scarlet colored face before smiling broadly. "I would love to Yami!" The boy screamed and threw himself into the arms of his now boyfriend and pressed his lips upon the ones of Yami.

A sudden feeling of hurt (a knife being thrust in the heart to be exact or perhaps it was the scream of delight from Yuugi), made the bickering duo stop and turn to look at the object of their affection, only to see him kissing their friend. Yami.

After they parted, they passed the frozen-from-shock Kaiba and Jounouchi, walking hand in hand and skipping out into the streets.

Later that evening, Kaiba and Jounouchi were in the Kaiba mansion, in the arms of each other, bawling their eyes out as Yuugi and Yami eloped to the Netherlands to get married.


	10. Fort

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping or not**

_**X-x-o-o—Fort**__**—**_o-o-x-X

"Yuugi…"

"Yeah?"

"Why is Yami glaring at you from behind a fort made from the couch?"

Yuugi looked at the fort, where indeed Yami was peeking out from behind the overturned couch and glaring at him. He then looked back at his childhood friend.

"Dentist."

"Oh."

Being granted his own body by the ancient Egyptian gods, Yami had to adjust to the modern world and had a lot of firsts. One of them, being a visit to the dentist.

* * *

**Author's Note: **I know I know too short.


	11. What Would You Do to Your Slaves?

**Pairing: Puzzleshipping, sort of…. Kind of…..**

_**X-x-o-o—What Would You Do to Your Slaves?—o-o-x-X**_

Pharaoh Atem walked through the corridors of his humongous palace in Egypt.

The monarch was bored out of his mind. His cousin Seth was too busy with whatever, Siamun was in charge of the slaves today, Mahad had his hands full with Mana, Mana had her hands full with Mahad, Isis was tending to the sick and all his other priests were busy as well. He now realized just how lonely he was.

He sighed, he had everything he wanted yet there was nothing to do. Atem continued trekking through his palace, until he felt tired and returned to his throne room. A lot of slaves were scrubbing away at the floor, Siamun supervising them.

They were to be receiving some guests from Rome, which Atem really didn't look forward to. He slumped in his throne; all slaves went rigid since they were now in the presence of the pharaoh of Egypt. One slip up and it would be off with their heads.

Atem watched them, since there was pretty much nothing else to do. Siamun would talk to him every so often but it was all about the Romans. His throne room was almost clean, so Siamun ordered all of them to move on to the dining room, all except one. He was a scrawny pale slave that had the same hairstyle as the pharaoh.

He was ordered to finish the throne room by himself and then help the others with preparing the dining room. Atem watched the small nervous slave scrub away. He had seen this one before, who wouldn't with the light skin tone and the crazy hair.

"You." He said, his voice booming in the huge near empty room. The slave stopped scrubbing and bowed before him. "Stand up." He said with less volume in his voice. The slave did as he was told but still held his head down.

"What is your name?" Atem asked. He had decided to entertain himself with this slave.

"Y-Yuugi my pharaoh." The slave stuttered. "Look at the me Yuugi." The pharaoh ordered.

Yuugi did as he was told and lifted his head, looking the pharaoh in the eyes. The slave had a fair but dirtied face, big round eyes with violet irises and plump cheeks even though the rest of his body was skinny.

Atem suddenly had nothing to say. So he did the first thing that came to mind. He turned his back to the slave, bended over and lifted up his kilt. The slave let out a sound that sounded like 'eep'.

"Pharaoh!" Came the voice of Siamun from the entrance of the throne room and it sounded quite outrageous. Atem's fight-or-flight instinct activated and he chose for the second. The pharaoh sped off into one of the hallways, Siamun on his heels.

Yuugi just stood there, glued to the floor. The howling laughter of the pharaoh reverberating throughout the palace.

Did the pharaoh of Egypt just moon him?

* * *

**Author's note: **Actually, there is a story behind this idea. Also to make up for the lack of words in the previous chapter.

Me and my friend (the one who came up with the wedding idea) had some free hours till our next class started. I had found these music quiz thingies on the internet and well, we decided to fill them in. It's basically, you have a question and the answer of the question will be the song that's pops up from shuffle of your playlist.

One of those questions was: "What would you do to your slaves?"

I don't remember what my answer was but my friends answer was "Moon". I immediately burst out laughing while he was staring at me funny. Then he too got it and we were laughing crazily in the cafetaria. The mental image of Atem mooning Yuugi immediately popped into my head and well... I finally decided to write it out.

I hope you enjoyed our randomness.


	12. Recruiting Donations

**Pairing: No pairing, just a crack drabble... I will call them crabbles. Wow, this is like my fifth crabble in a row?**

_**X-x-o-o—Recruiting Donations—o-o-x-X**_

"Good job everyone, the training has been finished with success. Now, we will truly go onto the streets to talk to real people." The manager said as he clapped once with his hands in enthusiasm.

Yami nodded and put down his small clipboard before standing up. He was handed a white coat with the logo of the WWF on the back. Even though the coat was a size S, Yami practically swam in it, the coat almost reaching his knees.

He grumbled incoherent things deep in his throat as he zipped the thick coat up. He was already short and the coat made him look even shorter. He hid the clipboard in a hidden pocket in the jacket and received a small whiteboard and a marker from one of the trainers.

Yami and four other young adults, had just finished training in 'The Art of Stalking Random People', as Yami dubbed it. His Aibou was angry at him for sitting on his bum all day while he and his grandfather worked all day long to get bread on the table. Yami was forced to go get a job.

Since he was too old for a supermarket job, he had applied via a student employment agency (not that he was a student, just old) for a job, any kind. He was phoned and asked if he would like to try out recruiting donations. He knew of the people, he and Yuugi would do anything to avoid them.

This was Yami's thinking process when he was phoned: _"I am sexy and I know it. They will stop and listen to me, perhaps even sign for a monthly donation?"_

"I'll do it!" He said happily into the phone, convinced by his own vain. An interview was planned in so he went there. It went smoothly. A pen was shoved into his hand and he had to sell it, just like that. Later that evening, he got a phone call from the manager, telling him that Yami had left a good impression and had to go through training.

The training was with four other people, them being girls. One of them, got all the facts wrong and could not get a donation if she went on like this, she was asking for ¥8.000 for Ra's sake! They were only supposed to ask for a monthly donation of ¥600. The fool.

Anyways, where were we? Oh yeah, they were going outdoors to confront real people.

The rules were simple, greet, make small talk, inform and convince, all this while being extremely enthusiastic. Except for the informing part, because saying baby pandas were dying at an alarmingly fast rate with a super happy smile was just plain creepy. And he was not Bakura. No, he was awesome Yami.

The group split up, Yami having to stay behind with one trainer and the foolish fat girl. On his whiteboard, the word rainforest was written with a couple of lines coming from the word. The goal was to make a mind map, tricking people into writing a word that came to mind and then telling them about the poor little rainforest critters that were dying. With Yami's irresistible charms, he was sure he would get the five donations so he would get a bonus of ¥6.500. With a smirk on his face, he addressed his first donor.

Oh how wrong he was.

It was as if he was air. Everyone ignored him. They did write something on his whiteboard but immediately walked off, saying they were in a hurry.

When he could tell his whole story about the poor baby pandas, they made up excuses that they were already donating money to a different fund, you know, the one who saves the starving children. Yeah right, they couldn't even name the fund.

Yami's smirk had turned into a sneer, scaring people off rather than interested. His smile returned when he was approached by a group of people. They were really eager to write something on his whiteboard. He happily let them.

When he started to tell his story about the sad baby pandas, they told them they were sixteen years old and too young to be a donor.

Shit, they were right. Yami sighed and turned his whiteboard so he could read what they had written.

"_My floorboards made from the trees"_

"_Animal sex"_

"_A lion mauling a zebra"_

And, was that a penis? There weren't even lions and zebras in the rainforest! Okay, that was the straw that broke the camel's back. He furiously swiped the drawn penis and the 'funny' words of the teenagers and threw the board to the side. The trainer saw this and called out to Yami, but he ignored him.

He stomped to smart dressed man, who was busily talking on his phone to someone. He held out the form in his left hand and a pen in his right. The man stopped talking to the phone and looked at Yami with a skeptic look, one eyebrow raised.

"I give you two choices." Yami started, holding out the pen and clipboard with the donation form, a wicked smile on his face. The man hung up his phone after saying a quick 'call you later' and stepped back with a gulp.

"Either you fill in this form with this pen." He said with the flick of his wrist to draw the attention to the pen in his hand. "Or you fill it with your own blood." The man gulped again, taking one more step back. Was that an eye shining on the forehead of the creepy young man?

The possibly businessman made a rapid turn and ran for his life. Yami would not have this and gave chase. "Yami!" The trainer called and gave chase as well, leaving the stupid girl alone to fend for herself.

Later that day, Yami was sitting in the headquarter, arms crossed over his chest, cheeks slightly puffed in stubbornness. It was evaluation time. "Yami, I think you're not really cut out for this job."

Yami scoffed. "I got a donation, didn't I?"

"Yes you did indeed. But they usually do not come with a restraining order. I am sorry but I don't think you are what we are looking for."

"Fine." Yami said and stood up. He left the headquarters with his head held high and his chest puffed out. He was too good to work on the streets anyway.

The ungrateful bastards.

* * *

**Author's Note: **I had so much fun writing this.

Based on a true story. I had too applied for a job to ask for donations on the street. But instead of WWF, I was going to help children to go to school in third world countries. Well, it didn't really work out for me. Like Yami, I couldn't stand being ignored and it really pissed me off. Instead of threatening people, I just said to the trainer that I wanted to quit. Now, I have no trouble talking to random stangers, I am someone who is easy to talk to, but those people KNOW you want money from them. The jacket described in this fic was exactly how the jacket looked on me, since I am about as tall as Yuugi and Yami.

The threat was actually the idea of my best friend. He was like, if they don't want to sign up, threaten them! And that was how this was born.

I love a vain Yami. The manager also said that I was vain... D: Hurray for a long one!


End file.
